Newark and Sherwood District council has banned dogs from nearly all of its parks, playgrounds and open spaces in the most severe clampdown seen in England and Wales.Remember, they're not banning dogs altogether, just asking you to step outside the areas they have deemed that you can't use. What's to complain about, eh?
"The council takes its responsibility seriously to work with local communities to keep children's play areas free of dog mess and its open spaces clean and green."
And if you do object?
"Somebody has got to take a stand somewhere and I know we are not going to please all of the people but that's tough."Oh, how fucking funny.
Do read the whole thing as squealing dog owners and bodies wonder what happened to personal responsibility and tolerance. And not a hint of fake science anywhere. After all, there isn't the need anymore since denormalisation became an acceptable political tool.
I think it's a cracking idea. Let's ban dogs from pubs too. Some people don't like them and choice and property rights should never, ever, be allowed to rear their ugly heads. For the chiiildren, of course.
Come and join us on the dark side, dog owners, you are now officially a stain on decent society. Enjoy your smokefree pint, with your dog safely shoved outside, and think on.
And yes, I'm being savagely sarcastic.
H/T Man Widdicombe