Sunday, 23 October 2011

Drunkorexia: The New Student Health Scare

Ever heard of 'drunkorexia'? No, neither had I, but I'll bet we hear more of it in the future. Probably from Alcohol Concern.

More students on university and college campuses are cutting calories during the day so they can binge drink at night, leaving them open to long-term health problems, new U.S. research suggests.
Hmm, sounds like what students have been doing for decades, saving their money up for a party by making economies elsewhere. Is there something I've missed?

Results from a study out of the University of Missouri found that as many as one in five students save their calories for alcohol, an eating and drinking disorder dubbed 'drunkorexia.'
Err, hold on, are you saying that this is driven by a desire to stay slim rather than just lack of funds? Well, that makes it a bit of a different fish-bearing kettle, doesn't it? Hey Jamie Oliver, this is what is commonly known as an unintended consequence of people like you being hideous arseholes.

The findings, which have been presented publicly but not peer-reviewed, ...
Colour me not surprised.

... are part of a growing body of research showing drunkorexia as a trend on campuses.
The cause?

Students in the study said their motivations to be drunkorexic included getting drunk faster, spending money on alcohol that might otherwise be spent on food, and keeping their weight down.
The first two will be recognisable to anyone who has ever attended university, the last is encouraged by the modern slimming fad - sponsored by governments worldwide of late, funny enough - so hardly surprising.

The growing problem is another issue counsellors will have to handle as students spend their limited funds in potentially unhealthy ways, said Dr. Valerie Taylor, chief of psychiatry at Women's College Hospital in Toronto.
Because students have always been a paragon of health in the past, of course. Seriously, where did this woman get her education? In an Amish community or something?

"It's ironic. Society has to adapt to our changing environment and these kids are doing the same thing," Taylor said.
Students are the same people as in society? You don't say. And they adapt too? Crikey! You make them sound almost like humans.

"Like other universities, we are wrestling with the societal issue of alcohol consumption and excessive drinking in the university-aged population," the university's dean of student affairs, John Pierce, said in a statement at the time. "We've been proactively addressing this issue for several years and will continue to do so."
Good luck with that, John, you may find that you're banging your head against a centuries old brick wall, though.

The research suggests the majority of drunkorexics are women — they were three times more likely to have the disorder than men.
And why would that be?

"Women are bombarded with lots of images with what's socially acceptable," Taylor said. "They desperately want to not gain weight.

"If they can only consume so many calories a day . . . that's going to come from alcohol."
Oh, I see. It's the images they are bombarded with - presumably the implication being that evil businesses and Hollywood are doing that - and not worldwide disdain over obesity from governments, that is the problem.

What these students may not be aware of is that drunkorexia could affect their ability to learn and to make decisions, [...] the Missouri study suggests.
So that's what happened with our university-educated politicians, then. It all becomes crystal clear now.

H/T Cage


15 comments:

James said...

What a fun diet! Have you got any tips on getting started, Dick?

Dick Puddlecote said...

It's how I avoid middle-age spread James :)

Carl Minns said...

Satire is dead

P T Barnum said...

I'm just relieved we've got through, at the University I freelance at, the first month of the new academic year with no alcohol-caused deaths, unlike last year (a fall from the 14th floor during a drunken dare). Some ugly episodes and unwanted pregnancies, but no deaths. 18 year olds now are so very young, much younger than in my day, like little kids in their emotional development, and coming from their protected environments they cut loose without having an iota of commonsense towards self-preservation.

I wonder whose fault that is.

IanPJ said...

She has obviously never heard of The Buffalo Theory, an excellent educational advantage tool.

A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

...and I believe its already been peer reviewed...

Leg-iron said...

Students can survive perfectly well on a diet of tripe, pig's head brawn and Pot Noodle.

As long as it's supplemented with plenty of beer.

None of my cohorts died of malnutrition. In fact, as far as I'm aware, none of them have died yet.

'Drinkorexia' is a gross insult to anorexics too. There are around 1800 calories in a bottle of whisky so students are hardly in the same situation as an anorexic.

This has the potential to stir up trouble. I hope nobody's going to drop any cats among any pigeons...

Xopher said...

'drunkorexia.' - Who ever invents a new word can c;aim to be an 'EXPERT'.
End of discussion

Anonymous said...

Maybe if they didn't have campus wide smoking bans indoors and out then some students might take to tobacco to calm their appetites and keep their weight under control, but since that is forbidden then binge drinking after a day of dieting is the only recourse given to them. If they ban that one too then they'll just have to slit their wrists and give up on it. University won't be much worth going anyhow, not that it is currently, between high cost, indoctrination pushed instead of education taught, smoking bans, drinking bans, lots of free vaccines and antidepressants handed out in the infirmary though.

TheBigYin said...

"Women are bombarded with lots of images with what's socially acceptable," Taylor said. "They desperately want to not gain weight.

Stand by for the likes of Alcohol Concern and Weightwatchers demanding that all scenes of wimmin drinking to be cut from movies or warnings before the movie warning patrons that this film contains people enjoying themselves.

PS: I read that at C.A.G.E's place the other day. The mind boggles.

Weekend Yachtsman said...

In the 70's I knew a guy at St. Andrews who lived on beer.

His daily consumption was around ten pints, and as far as anyone could find out he never ate anything.

He did get rather skinny and unhealthy-looking after a while.

Plus ca change...

Surreptitious Evil said...

Oh, well, it was usually "get a decent meal inside you so you don't wimp out early" 'when I were a lad". Unless you were really broke, in which case you went and gave blood first.

But that's engineers for you.

nisakiman said...

"In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Arf, guffaw...

Yer, taught that Stephen Hawking geezer all he knows, innit. Amazing what fifteen pints can do...

TheBigYin said...

Fuck this Drunkorexia bullshit, I'm going on the Bill Werbenuik diet...I've already started, cheers.

The Travelling Toper said...

Results from a study out of the University of Missouri

It might be interesting to start publishing the names of the people/companies that commission these ' studies.'

churchmousec said...

This 'phenomenon' is as old as the hills. Girls have been doing this for yonks. Did any of them die? No, the ones I know are happily married working mothers with healthy, grown children.

(Sigh.)

Churchmouse