Not the real Santa you understand, kids, but the one those swell, fun-loving public health guys in Mexico have created. You know, the obese kidnapped diabetic Santa Claus who has had a leg amputated due to "the burden of disease and death from the consumption of sugary drinks" and considers the Coca-Cola Company to be "as much of experts in children as paedophiles" (sic).
Well ho ho bloody ho to you too, you mad chimichanga chomper.
When I say we are firmly on the side of the angels here, I'm not kidding you know. Merry Christmas.
H/T Simon "sugar is the new tobacco" Capewell via Twitter