Old King Cole was a merry old soul and a merry old soul was he; He called for his pipe, and he called for his bowl but he only got his bowl because some bullshit statistics showed that if he smoked his pipe then at least two of his fiddlers would die of cancer.There are plenty more updated nursery rhymes at the awesome Daily Mash today.
Half a pound of tuppenny rice,
Half a pound of treacle.
By the way, the chief medical officer says that amount of treacle is really bad for you and that excessive treacle eating is costing this country £14bn a day in lost productivity and exploding children.
Yes, it's only satire but ... the annoyance which presumably motivated their piece is widespread, and hatred of petty and intrusive laws pretty much universal. So where (apart from our esteemed blog mascot, of course) are the politicians to stand up for us?
Abso-fucking-lutely no-bastard-where, is the answer.