What on earth is happening in Jockland? I've joked about their recent vicious addiction to Stalinist bansturbation, but this deserves some sort of award for fuckwittery above and beyond the call of duty.
BAR staff in Edinburgh have been banned from asking customers if they would like the "same again" – and told to offer a glass of water instead. The move ... has been introduced as part of the Licensing (Scotland) Act which comes into force next week
A prize of "cash behind the bar" can no longer be given as a reward for winning a pub quiz, while special offers such as "buy two glasses of wine and get the rest of the bottle free" have also been outlawed.
And offering free drinks to customers who have perhaps waited too long for a meal or suffered some other inconvenience has also been prohibited.
Some publicans say they have even been told to keep a note of how much each individual customer had consumed.
Not content with killing off thousands of pubs by telling them they have to throw their customers outside for enjoying a legal product, these interfering spoodge-garglers are now forcing bar workers into mandatory - yes, mandatory - training courses which instruct them how to discourage customers from buying the very fucking products that their employer sells!
Are those who thought this up suffering from some sort of clue deficit disorder? If I ran a pub and one of my staff were stopping Jock and his wifey from having 'the same again' but handing them a glass of water instead, his P45 would be in his hand the moment he had released his grip on the tap.
The health hysteria north of the border has gone beyond misguided, or authoritarian - this surely confirms that those in positions of authority in Scotland are descending rapidly into insanity.
As one bar owner succinctly put it:
"We have had all of our freedom taken away to try to run a bar, and provide a social and fun place."
All this, remember, in a drive to restrict the public to unit intakes pulled out of thin air, when we are all drinking less than ten years ago, and in the face of recent revelations that light drinkers/teetotallers are a cost burden on the NHS. And in an environment where only those over 18, which is usually the age at which we assume a person should be entitled to make their own decisions in life, are legally allowed to purchase the products on offer.
Anyone who lives in the Soviet republic of Jockland has my deepest sympathy. You are being led by psychotically puritan politicians who are so dense they could bend light.
Good grief.