Wednesday 19 August 2009

Britain's Ban Mentality Is Now An Advertising Tool



The Times have put their finger firmly on a new phenomenon amongst visitor attractions. That of using a 'ban' as a marketing ploy.

Jealous of Alton Towers' silly season Speedo ban, which won acres of news coverage last week, Thorpe Park announced their own free advertising stunt today: banning BO.

The Telegraph duly rolled out a 'thrillologist' to point out how terrifying rides increase sweating and that, therefore, a ban is quite understandable.

Personally, I'd be cynical about the 'terrifying' properties of a ride if its speed didn't easily disperse BO, and if a rider is so non-plussed by the experience that they have the wherewithal to worry about a smell, it's probably no more thrilling than rotating tea cups.

However, it seems that 'the ban as an advertising tool' is now installed as a valid marketing technique, complete with interfering officialdom and overbearing threats.

Wardens on the rides will also remind people to consider their fellow passengers and anyone ignoring the warnings will be escorted off. Those who continue to do so will be asked to leave the park.

Thorpe Park aren't daft. They will have no doubt calculated that even this draconian approach won't put paying customers off and that the publicity will still result in a net gain.

What should happen, of course, is for Alton Towers and Thorpe Park to witness a huge drop in visitor numbers which makes them rue the day they ever thought up such a crackpot scheme. However, the British pleblic have become so weak-willed, spineless, subservient and timidly compliant in the face of an increasing ban mentality from government, local authorities, and others who 'know better' that they will merely mutter 'mustn't grumble' and drag their knuckles up to the entrances to be financially butt-fucked anyway.

And as they dutifully keep their arms down (or eagerly report others who don't), they will tell themselves that it's for the best, and isn't it great that their betters are watching over their every move.

It's for their own good, after all.




4 comments:

BTS said...

I'm tempted to head over there with a bag full of stink bombs.

Or have they been banned already..?

Mac the Knife said...

@BTS

They're probably classified as firearms by now, along with everything else from a box of paperclips to a stick of rock.

@DP

Why didn't they just go the whole hog and ban people from shitting their pants? Who knows, TP's target audience may even have got the 'joke'.

My, my. Don't I sound bitter + twisted tonight? :)

BTS said...

Good plan there Mac - seriously dodgy vindaloo the night before a visit.

And some slightly past it eggs.

I think we have a plan..

The witch from Essex said...

Will they be employing EHO's to do the armpit sniffing test ??
I expect the good officers of the local council will be queuing up for the job.