Friday 10 September 2010

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

Having worked for two years at a council in the 80s, my over-riding memory of the time spent there is meetings. Lots of 'em. Then, when a decision had finally been reached, a recommendation was kicked upstairs to the councillors ... who would hold further meetings.

Now, assuming that local authorities worldwide are probably still run along similar lines, one has to wonder how something like this managed to get through all that without someone raising a few possible unintended consequences.

Preventable, BCAA Traffic Safety Foundation, and the District of West Vancouver have launched a 3D illusion geared to make drivers slow down at high-risk intersections.

If you’ve read the Vancouver Sun, Province, or National Post articles or heard interviews on Vancouver radio and TV programs about the illusion, you’d know that drivers near 22nd street in West Vancouver will be confronted with what seems like a young girl running after a ball in front of their vehicle. In reality, it’s a decal on the pavement that looks like a real person. Signage near the 3D image reads “You’re probably not expecting kids to run out on the road.”
What could possibly go wrong? Apart from the scenarios quickly spotted by commenters to the article, of course.

Good grief.


23 comments:

JuliaM said...

Ooooh, let me guess:

'Oh, looks like a child ran into the road, must be one of those stupid 3D images that the council...

*SQUISH*

'Oh, not again..!'

Curmudgeon said...

If it was an image of a cyclist, a lot of drivers would probably speed up ;-)

Longrider said...

That is, without doubt one of the most stupid and irresponsible ideas I've seen in the name of road safety yet.

Mr Civil Libertarian said...

You bastard, you've ended my almost 1 month silence. This rank stupidity forced me to blog about it.

Gawain Towler said...

Perfect example of well meaning idiocy. Thank you

Wtrd Rec:
Fuled

Bucko said...

Fucking muppets. Just when you think you've seen it all...

Love Julia's comment :-)

Bill Sticker said...

Court case in West Van;

Defendant; "But I thought it was only a decal"

/headdesk

Hell, it's University of British Columbia la-la land over there. They're full of weird and not so wonderful ideas.

Anonymous said...

Anyone who lives in cuckoovilles
like Vancouver deserves to be run over.


Smoking husky

Snowolf said...

As for the decision making process, perhaps the years have dulled the memories, Dick. Speaking as one who works in the public sector at present, this idea would be rushed through with indecent haste.

Is it attention grabbing? Check.

Well it get some wonk some coverage in the in house and local press? Check, quite obviously.

Is it 'radical'? Check.

Does it mean increased funding for some little empire? Check.

Is it totally unnecessary, yet easily justified in terms of H&S and chiildren? Check.

It's only the decisions about saving money and collapsing internal empires that are agonised over in the hope that decision doesn't have to be made by you.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Curmudgeon: Mischievous. ;)

Snowolf: Cheers for the update. That figures.

BTS said...

They should go for the full effect - maybe combining the image with a speed bump and placed it just after a blind corner..?

Frank Davis said...

OK, so you're driving down the road, and you come to the decal, and you brake, maybe even coming to a complete stop. You realise it's just a decal, but you're eyes are still telling you it's a little girl. So when you start moving again, and continue down the road, you still half believe that you're running over a little girl.

But you get used to it after you've run her over 30 or 40 times during the next couple of months.

So this amounts to a way of training people to run over children. Because you have to get used to driving over that little girl if you don't want to turn round and go some other way.

Anonymous said...

Dopey driver spots decal kid at the last moment, swerves violently into oncoming traffic causing 5 car devastation on the highway, rubbernecker looses control and mows down a group of pedestrians. The survivors and bereaved sue Vancouver authorities for $Trillions. Vancouver councillors go to gaol, the city goes bankrupt and has to cut back on street decals and pay off all employees.

Decal kid survives unscathed.

Mark Wadsworth said...

I think it is pure unbridled genius. And why stop there?

Why not have 3D holograms flash up? Why not have an in-car thingy that displays things on your windscreen at random?

How about cardboard models that dangle on elastic strings round every sharp bend? Speed bumps that make a car-horn sound when you drive over them? Traffic lights that alternate between orange and red and green at will?

Massive metal blades that swing across your path when you are least expecting (like Indiana Jones in that temple thingy)?

This will ALL add to road safety, I promise you.

Mark Wadsworth said...

Or they could have machines that release footballs in your path if you are going too fast to trick you into thinking that there are kids about.

Or maybe pushchairs or wheelchairs that roll in front of you from behind parked cars.

Or parked cars whose driver's side door open automatically in front of you on narrow streets.

I could do this for a living!!!

Dick Puddlecote said...

MW: Have you been bugging Brake board meetings again?

Angry Exile said...

Oh for fuck's sake. And I thought traffic calming, which I've always felt is from a line of thinking that would try to slow down Usain Bolt by leaving a rake in his lane, was a stupid idea. But this? If there was a Nobel prize for Stupid or Olympic medals for window licking mentalism this would run away with every gong.

TURTLE said...

So what happens if twin girls run in to the road & they look the same as the decal...? Shit, that only gives me a 1 in 3 chance of knocking the right one down...!

subrosa said...

I've family who live in West Vancouver. Off to email them about this. One doesn't tolerate fools in any shape or form.

Anonymous said...

Why is it a white child in the picture? Is this a product of market research?

JuliaM said...

"Why is it a white child in the picture? Is this a product of market research?"

According to the stats, it shouldn't be (unless, of course, she's dressed in rags and malnourished)...

BTS said...

Buggger. I forgot sound effects - a recording of a child's scream which ends abruptly as you go over the speed bump would be a nice touch.

And filming the results could generate revenue - they do still pay £250 for all the tapes shown on television, don't they..?

J Bonington Jagworth said...

Since it is the pedestrian who should be discouraged from playing in the road, how about images of cars (with big teeth) jumping out of the pavement?

It's just as sensible.