Monday 9 May 2011

Candy: The Latest 'Gateway Drug'

'Twas relaxation paradise again - naturally - in Prague, but it's still nose to the grindstone time for another couple of days, so an explanation of how Czech lefties and an NHS administrator contrived to inflict the only small blights on an otherwise blissful break will have to wait till tomorrow.

For now, though, what do you think US righteous will do once they realise that this kind of activity is going on?

Got it in one.

A middle school near Grand Rapids has banned sugary Smarties candy, saying it's being crushed and inhaled and can be a gateway to "inappropriate substances."
We are, of course, talking the American Smarties here, which are not unlike Refreshers, it would seem.

Northern Hills Middle School is part of the Forest Hills district. Principal Nancy Susterka says there are credible reports that kids are crushing the Smarties and inhaling the powder. She says it can cause infections, chronic coughing and choking.
All very scary, even if woefully inaccurate according to a Wall Street Journal article in 2009.

Children don't inhale the powder or try to get it into their lungs; they pour it into their mouths and exhale quickly, causing a cloud of fine dust to emerge.
Still, the way things are going over there, it was only a matter of time before the sweets were banned or taxed over their sugar content anyway. It's just a more satisfying scare 'kick' for bansturbation addicts this way.

H/T LRC Blog via David G


Anonymous said...

Just you wait until someone over here alights upon "twiglet" smoking - something which I assumed was a total wind up when I heard about it, and so did procure one of the aforementioned "twiglets" - which did appear to be mostly hollow when I bit off one end and duly set alight the other and inhaled - it was a pretty damn horrible taste - a bit like smoking your first herbal (as in herbal - as once sold in health stores - and not a euphemism !) and unless you puff away like a bellows it goes out pretty quickly and requires regular relighting - but it can be done ! And as some people seemed to adjust to and only smoke "herbal cigarettes" no doubt some, especially misguided yoof, would similarly get addicted to smoking twiglets. So I suggest twiglets are withdrawn from sale as they are obviously just a cigarette substitute/gateway device !

TheFatBigot said...

I hate to think what they'd make of Spangles (yes, I know they have Jolly Ranchers but they're not the same, the paper doesn't stick to them the way it did to Spangles once they'd been loose in your sweaty pocket for an hour or so).

Anonymous said...

But doesn’t it just go to show that even with all the brainwashing and mind-numbing and batting on and on and on and on about how awful smoking is, there is still something magical and just a touch glamorous about breathing out smoke, even if it’s not “real” smoke? I can remember as a kid on frosty mornings walking (yes, walking!) to school, and watching clouds of breath floating in the cold air and thinking: “I wish this was real smoke” and trying to make it drift and stay hanging in the air like real smoke did. This from a child of non-smoking parents, too (anti-smokers please take note)!

Now, I wonder how long it’ll be before they ban breathing on especially cold days because it “looks like” smoking ………?

banned said...

You don't actually get a rush? Swizz.

JuliaM said...

Nooooooooo! You'll take my Twiglets when you pry them from my cold, dead hands!

Anonymous said...

You can see the authorities' point. I mean, if you let them start with Smarties they might move onto something harder, like sherbert fountains. (Try inhaling one of those!)

Karl Fasbracke said...

I wonder if this isn't really a fortunate thing. If the public space is flooded with such stories, nobody wants to hear the word ban anymore. Maybe we just need more bans so we can live live in peace again.

Ian R Thorpe said...

A few days in the liberated atmosphere of Prague and you're going soft Dick.

Sugar is next on the list of substances to be criminalised once alcohol has been sent the same way as tobacco.

And Sherbet - very dodgy stuff that.