Thursday, 1 July 2010

What Dreams May Come

Looks like yesterday was a bad day for business if you're a self-righteous mockney twat.

The Jamie Oliver-approach will not work in tackling public health problems like obesity and smoking, the health secretary says.

Mr Lansley said people needed to take responsibility for their own health.

"If we are constantly lecturing people and trying to tell them what to do, we will actually find that we undermine and are counterproductive in the results that we achieve,".
{insert short sound file of the Hallelujah Chorus here}

I never thought I'd be jealous of a minister (even though I held such a position in a dream sequence once), but those who know my views on 'jerk off' Jamie will be unsurprised to know that I'd have given my 1980s 7" vinyl picture disc collection to have been able to deliver that withering dismissal of his methods. And to the comrades of the BMA, too.

The self-appointed saviour of our nation isn't too happy with his relegation to background noise, of course.

"I'm not encouraged by the news that the new health minister has summed up 8 years of hard work in a few lines for the sake of a headline," said Mr Oliver.
Retorts the person whose 'hard work' for the last 8 years has consisted of making headlines for the sake of selling more books.

Coming to his defence was our old friend, Alan 'Libertarian by nature' Maryon-Davies.

"Of course, we could probably do a little less nagging, but you still need to nudge people."
Keep plugging with those libertarian ideals, eh Al? Oh yeah, and perhaps buy a dictionary?

Despite previous reservations, this is all very promising from Mr Lansley, who only the day before engaged with our forthright blog mascot on the same area of policy.

Philip Davies: "May I urge the Secretary of State to get NICE to go back to what most people think it is for, which is to monitor the cost-effectiveness and clinical effectiveness of drugs? Many people do not think that it does a particularly good job on that, anyway, but it is currently indulged in empire building, with its ridiculous drivel in recent weeks on smoking breath tests for pregnant women, compulsory sex education for five-year-olds and subsidies for food companies to make healthier food. Surely it ought to go back to what it should be doing, and doing it better, rather than empire building, as it is doing."

Andrew Lansley: "In 2005 the previous Government charged NICE with producing public health guidance as part of its work. As I establish a more integrated and effective public health service, I shall consider how the advice of NICE fits into that strategic framework."
Not exactly a ringing endorsement there, I thought. More like a 'not us, Guv' and a vague implication that the current arrangements may change. In light of Lansley's speech today, perhaps the change might not be favourable to NICE ... which would be a bloody good thing.

Now, encouraging as this all appears, the Puddlecote mistrust of politicians runs rather deep so enthusiasm/ire will remain on ice until such time as hopes of a change in the dictatorial state attitude are fulfilled/dashed.

But the still small squeal of Jamie Oliver is a delightful taster of what could follow if Lansley gets heavy on the collective righteous ass. I was therefore, last night, mostly dreaming of an upcoming indignant cacophony.



Mick Turatian said...

I too enjoyed Jamie Oliver's much reported pukka rant-statement.

It's hard to beat the discomfiture of someone suffering rejection who has been encouraged to stray well beyond the limits of his modest abilities and come to regard himself as an annointed expert.

Angry Exile said...

After 8 years of hard self-publicity and hectoring the prick still can't see that pushing people where they don't want to go is self defeating, particularly when it comes from such an annoying bastard. I do quite like his bread recipes but just the sight of his smug grin or the sound of his voice these days and I'm down the nearest McDonalds, just on the principle of an early death being preferable to the possibility of one day being in the same nursing home as the cunt.

Bucko said...

It's a pity he has to be such an interfereing twat because he's actually quite a good chef.

Anonymous said...

I've just lobbed up my tater ash and suet dumplings all over
Harold Godwinson ,the burmese temple cat

I will now have to go and sit in the backyard of The Devils Own Inne
sink a skinfull of the big G and
and then bury a 5 pepper lamb
Vindaloo with double frites.
In the yard full of Neanderthals and "missing links" I will endeavour to entice. in simple
english,to get the primitives to write to Nick Clegg pleading for freedom, Maybe amongst the pimps,
prositutes,pervos,whackos and de frocked viacars I may find a
budding Coer de Lion.

West Pennine Gulag
Secure Unit

ian R Thorpe said...

We always knew he was a twat.

I don't like to think what might happen to him should he ever set foot in the land of pie eaters (my former domicile Wigan) and start preaching the virtyues of cous cous.

We can only hope Heston Blumenthal's plan to force feed snail porridge to hospital patients comes to a similar end

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure he aspires to Sir Jamie...(and I think he'll get one, too, if he can just keep it going til NL get back in).