Via Old Holborn, I see that Lord Darzi has obviously done all the lying he was asked to perform for Labour and has now fucked off, on a fat salary and with a permanent peerage for his trouble.
But before we finally wave a happy adieu to this healthist fudge-packer from the Lords front benches, let me just point out one of his last pronouncements before the Woolsack.
Lord Laird (Crossbench)
To ask Her Majesty's Government what proposals they have to ensure that people do not have to smoke tobacco passively in public places which are in the open.
Lord Darzi of Denham (Parliamentary Under-Secretary, Department of Health; Labour)
There is no intention at this time to extend the smokefree law to any outdoor places. To make any non-enclosed place smokefree would require new regulations to be made; that would usually happen only after a process of public consultation.
Really Darzi? Are you sure? Cos the Corrupt Borough of Tower Hamlets* has done just that, apparently.
A PARK in the East End is to become the first outdoor public place in Britain to be made smoke-free.
Parts of Mile End Park in Tower Hamlets will be off limits to smokers from Monday 20 July, with warning signs appearing around the park this week.
Tower Hamlets council will therefore be the first local authority in the UK to extend the smoking ban to open public places**.
All about health, they always said. So, considering there isn't a shred of evidence of harm from secondary smoking outdoors (nor will there ever be), what is the reasoning behind this?
The Mile End Park ban will apply to the children’s area, and is aimed at preventing children from taking up the habit, as well as protecting them from the effects of "passive" smoking.
Beg pardon? Are we talking about the same Mile End Park which extends over the Mile End Road?
And these righteous cocks are worried about a few wisps of smoke? Good grief with frigging bells and whistles on.
This is the kind of hysterical over-reaction that Darzi and his ilk have helped to foster in the feeble minds of empire-builders and bigoted rubber band flickers the length and breadth of the country.
Presumably, the 'preventing children from taking up the habit' bit is that kids seeing people smoking will make them want to do so as well. An insignificant concern at the time of implementing the smoking ban which necessitated hundreds of thousands of smokers being thrust into the view of kiddywinks nationwide, but now vitally important, it would seem. Nothing like a consistent line of argument, is there?
Of course, what the Corrupt Borough of Tower Hamlets failed to mention in their triumphant piss release is that the measure is entirely unenforceable in law. It is therefore an oxymoron, a voluntary ban. On that score, Lord Darzi was correct.
Having travelled through Tower Hamlets just last month (it's a toilet, sorry), one would have thought they would have more to tackle than something so irrelevant, pointless and arrogant as this. But then, while the money is being chucked their way by Darzi's righteous, socialist cock-munching pals, for such schemes, they're going to spend it, aren't they?
* Readers of Private Eye will be well aware of how council leader Lutfur Rahman is turning Tower Hamlets into an exclusively Bangladeshi Borough, and other abuses.
** Not strictly true. A Lib Dem London Borough have already been as stupid.