Thursday, 27 August 2009

Only A Matter Of Time

You may remember, a little while ago, the roll-out of new measures to stop parents drinking in front of the chiiildren, complete with accompanying web-site and sanctimonious dribbling from the proper cunt, Ian Gilmore.

As I wrote at the time:

Can you smell the faint whiff of future prohibition with regard to uncorking a Pinot Grigio in front of the kiddies yet?

With the likes of Alcohol Concern following the same methods laid down in a template provided by tobacco control harpies, and with plans to hide tobacco in the pipeline, it can't be long before someone over here (most likely to be Scottish) thinks legislation along similar lines should apply to alcohol.

And if they do, they will almost certainly point to another country where such a thing is a great success. Somewhere like Maine, USA, perhaps.

A new law that goes into effect Sept. 12 will prohibit children from observing wine tastings.

An amendment to L.D. 498 by Rep. David Webster, D-Freeport, states, "Taste-testing activities must be conducted in a manner that precludes the possibility of observation by children."

Don Shenker will no doubt come in his pants on reading of such glorious bansturbation.

Small wine shop owner Beth Hudson, in consultation with her local Liquor Enforcement Officer, has been having trouble trying to accommodate such a daft law.

"I said I could close the blinds, and he said no," Hudson said. "I would have to partition off or put up some draperies. Look at my store. How am I supposed to do that? We usually have (wine tastings) in front of the fireplace and we serve cheese and crackers. In order to do that, people would have to be cramped in a smaller space. It would appear like the adults were doing something shameful."

I think that's the point, dear.

Next stop for such silliness - Scotland. It's only a matter of time.


BTS said...

That won't make it appear all the more interesting to the kiddies will it..?

As a kid I thought voting was cool because it was only for adults and done in secrecy, so I wanted to be able to vote.

One day my dream came true. And the next day I realised what a pointless waste of drinking time it was as the choice was always between the lesser of two c***s..

Anonymous said...

If Scotland 'embraces' such a proposal then it'll be fun trying to stop kids from catching sight of the winos between George Square and Central Station in Glasgow. Perhaps special wino-free routes will be worked out for the kids or maybe the winos are already dragged off to a designated area (otherwise known as a police cell).


Curmudgeon said...

Are children not allowed into licensed restaurants in Maine, then?

Mind you, in some of the loopier parts of the US they probably aren't.

Or you can't serve alcohol and food in the same establishment, or some such nonsense.

The witch from Essex said...

All the exciting and interesting things happen behind closed doors and curtains and the kids know that !!

Anonymous said...

You can imagine what the kids themselves think. Something along the lines of 'stupid fuckers' is my guess.