Monday 1 June 2009

Plane Stupid

No, seriously, this has to be a joke?

British Airways flight delayed by missing ashtray

A British Airways flight from Heathrow was delayed for nearly half an hour – while crew searched for an ashtray to put in the lavatory.

Err ... but isn't smoking banned everywhere except a bunker in Milton fucking Keynes these days?

The plane was grounded while airline staff searched for another ashtray to replace one that had been removed from a lavatory door.

The captain even suggested that ground crew "go and rob one" from another aircraft or even have the entire door replaced ...

Sorry, I'm not buying it. What month is it? April?

British Airways apologised for the delay but said that it was only abiding by European flight regulations.

Oh, I see, I get it now.

"It is a legal requirement, under air navigation orders, to have ashtrays because while smoking is not permitted on flights, if someone were to light a cigarette on board there must be somewhere to safely extinguish it," a spokesman for the airline said.

Haven't they ever heard of a tap?

It truly does beggar belief how a legal product which, just a couple of years ago, was considered mundane, has now been promoted into its current position of being as dangerous as Sarin gas and an unpinned grenade.

Perspective, please?


idlex said...

Funny that. I flew to Japan in 2005. 10 hours without a cigarette. And in the W.C. there was a sign which said that if anyone lit a cigarette in there, the captain would be forced to descend and land the plane at the nearest airport, before ejecting the errant passenger. Really!

I suppose the sign's still there. But there's an ashtray now too.

Unknown said...

Idlex...tell me what would have happened if both pilots lit up in the bog - eh?

blind steve said...

"Haven't they ever heard of a tap?"

Frankly I'd also hope that the carpet in an aircraft was sufficiently fireproof to deal with the odd ciggy stub.

Anonymous said...

Probably the pilots were drunk and needed to sober up a bit.
Don't tell me that the pilots are not having a fag at the wheel.

Carmen D'Cruz said...

It depends on who runs the bunker in Milton Keynes. I'd imagine you're only allowed to smoke outside, 100m away from it.

I miss people smoking everywhere. Now my bus smells of piss and vomit :-(