Friday, 2 October 2009

The Strife Of Brian


Via Man Widdicombe.


Listen, Brian, you thistle-chewing kilt-lifting bell end, I know that's on the wish list for Gilmore's new model temperance movement, but you're not meant to unveil it so soon. Capiche?

You'll be kicked out of righteous school sharpish if you keep fucking up like that, sunshine.




11 comments:

Surreptitious Evil said...

As well as being dangerously illiberal, it is complete ignorant bollocks.

Let's think. My hypothetical Dept of Health Enforcement licence allows me to buy 365 units per year. One day, I buy my 365 units and then I drink them that evening. In the morning, I will probably be dead but I have definitely been 'binge' drinking.

captainff said...

Can I clear up a confusion before it arises? I'm not Jane from Manchester but I am glad to see that others have noticed the stupidity of Brian's proposal.

Thank you!

TheBigYin said...

This reminds me of that other cocksucker Le Grande, or something like that, who would like to see smokers get a 'licence' from the doc to buy tobacco products. Bastards!

subrosa said...

Oh I support Brian. In fact I think we should have official ration books for alcohol. Everyone in the land should be able to view these books and see how much the person consumes.

Then, if it's one bottle of Glenfiddich too much off to the revamped pregnant teenagers' luxury houses with them.

Of course the pregnant teenagers will not be in residence because labour's policy would have worked and no female under the age of 30 will uncross their legs in the presence of a male.

Aye, I'm with Brian.

Curmudgeon said...

And nobody has a licence to buy any heroin or cocaine, ergo we have no drug problem.

Brilliant!

Andy Davis said...

Sorry DP but Brian is right on the money- The Temperance movement(Labour) has spoken.
http://www.labourlist.org/drinkers-licences-a-radical-new-way-to-curb-excess-cowan

Bill Sticker said...

Soo, this prohibition of alcohol works doesn't it? Well, prohibition has always tended to do more harm than good.

Speakeasy's anyone?

BTS said...

I'm halfway through a bottle of vodka and I still can't see how this could possibly work.

Shame they don't publish people's full addresses in the papers isn't it..?

Dick Puddlecote said...

Jeez, Andy Davis, that LabourLost article is a shocker. And doesn't it just brutally expose the mentality of these dictatorial wankstains?

Good to see him getting a right spanking in the comments, but good lord, what sort of pompous cunt must he be to even consider such an idea?

Anonymous said...

Calvin Dave
Another Pictish haggis nibbling
McSchmuck loitering round the glens
hounding joy from the few remaining
crofts where smiles are frowned on
and a wee dram is considered the
urine of Lucifer.Will no one rid us
of these putrified puritans before
they make the land unfit to be
called home.


Toquemada(OrdumDominicum)xxisiecle

banned said...

Oh dear, I have mentioned this idea as a bit of a lark once or twice over the past 12 months; each of us having an alcohol permit. Indeed Dick you kindly reposted from my blog entry The Gordon Brown which included

"I undertook NOT to supply alcohol to third parties ( sinisterly known as " buying a round " ) perhaps I should take that down in case it gives them any more silly ideas.