Friday 8 May 2009

Department Of Health Dick-Waggling

Remember that swine flu which was going to kill us all according to the BBC? Remember the department of health sprung into action to tell us all how deadly it was?

The Enfield Advertiser dedicated an entire third of a page to the hastily-rehashed flu ad. Just in case you missed it beside the whole page smoking cessation ad, it's ringed above.

Swine flu is worse than nuclear war, don't forget. Does this mean smoking is akin to inter-galactic pandemonium?

Or is it just that the DoH nannying section has a bigger budget than the scaremongering one?


Mark Wadsworth said...

You're not taking this seriously!

Swine 'flu will kill millions of use, just like ... er ... BSE and bird 'flu.

Unknown said...

I have found a use for all this scaremongering - it's called hayfever.

Method is to stand near where grass is being mown then go around sneezing a few times and watch people scatter.

Do you think the self righteous 'health volunteers' (or whatever they are called) would approach me when smoking outside a pub if I was sneezing all over the place?

Bloody marvellous idea, even if I do say so myself.

timbone said...

Got the leaflet today. Another complete waste of money and scaremongering. It is full of shite. Main advice is sneeze into a tissue, throw it in a bin and wash your hands asap. Normal people already do if they feel something coming on. The low life who don't most likely couldn't even read the leaflet. I think I will send for the DVD and ask for a copy in URDU.

Anonymous said...

Just sneeze into the leaflet and stick it back in the post box.
Its a fucking insult to tell us how to decide if we have pig flu.
The m.p.'s do enough troughing to know what pigs feel like.

Unknown said...

Another thought. Can someone explain 'stop smoking start living' to me. I may be incorrect but I actually thought I was a living being and generally had a life....

I must have been mistaking the word 'living'. Isn't that supposed to be nulab clone standard 'life'?

apologies, I promise not to make the same mistake again.

*bzzz click, I am a robot*

Antipholus Papps said...


How dare you equate yourself to a proper healthy living human being, you despicable drug addicted smoker you! You will never have a snog. You will never get laid. You will never know the joy of starting your own hard-working family.

Repent. Purify. Huff and puff and we'll blow your house down.

Unknown said...

Hmmm, is that all that I am missing?

At least I can still buy shoes tho.....

*lights up*