Midway Up Shit Creek, In The Vicinity Of The Hamlet Of Nofucking Paddles

1. Your people have no single fucking clue what in the wide wide world of field hockey is going on with the British electorate or why.

They know the Tories are dipping. But ask them why, and they smile a First-in-PPE-at-Arsepipe-College smile and say that "maybe it turns out people like a bully?". Bollocks. If people liked a bully I'd be drowning in Moët and John Lewis vouchers and sex texts. I am not. I don't know what's going on either, but I tell you what, we need more of a strategy than to say, "Ooo, winter's over in Narnia, let's watch the crocuses push up, and the rabbits hump and we can relax and put up our World Cup wallcharts."

No-nonsense political commentary at CiF from ... Malcolm Tucker?

If you haven't done already, you've simply got to go read the whole thing.